Elder Davis B Cox

Elder Davis B Cox

Monday, August 24, 2015

Monday August 13, 2015 - Reflections of Grandma Ruth

Davis, Grandma Wintle passed away Thursday August 13th.  She is greatly missed on this earth, however, she had been praying to be released.  She loved you dearly.  I know that there is one more angel looking over you.

August 3, 2011 

December 15, 2013

August 3, 2014 - Visit for Grandmas 94th birthday. 
January 21, 2015 - Goodbye visit to Grandma before leaving for the mission.

My thought for this week is to highlight Grandma Ruth.  95 years and 10 days of an amazing woman. I have always felt she was an angel here on earth and I am tender at her now being an angel from beyond.  I cherish my memories of growing up with her gentle love.  With that being said, I have rarely known a woman that could work so hard.  She was truly talented in so many areas. I cherish the moments of hugs and laughter. My love of gardening and all things growing were cultivated in her yard, as we walked and talked, weeded and harvested together in her garden in North Ogden. I have felt the same sense of accomplishment over the years that she expressed to me as we walked the long isle of her storage room in the basement...lined with jars and jars of every color and type of fruit and vegetable on this earth. I loved listening to her tell stories in the middle bedroom at grandma sleepover nights.  The smell of "Baby Magic lotion" as she animatedly tells the story of rocks in the belly of the wolf and the smart mama sheep. I really couldn't recall the story in detail, however, I do recall being highly entertained and entranced at many of her stories. Among my favorites memories are; hanging laundry out on the clothesline, playing spoons and games on the kitchen table with cousins, watching her paint, in awe at the talent and reaching into the deep freeze with feet in the air to find a twist-tied baggie full of gingerbread boys! Oh how many thousands of those as well as her peanut brittle and rhubarb pies (with the perfect crust of course) have we all enjoyed over the years.  

You would think that loss of eyesight and hearing would distract her from these activities; however, she did not let that detour.  I love the story of her going to the doctor at 92 and would have loved to have been there to hear her ask, " I just don't understand why I can only spend 6 hours in the garden and then I just have to rest, I am just so tired, something must be wrong!"  To this the doctor responded something like, “you do know you are 92 right!"  This instills in me my "forever young attitude." I love the teaching of hard work, and self-sufficiency that she represents to me.  I value hard work and hope to pass that on to my children. I cherish her legacy and love of family and the happiness that it gave her to talk of her amazing children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.  I loved my recent visit with her during her brief stay in the nursing home. I took her for a short, slow and very careful walk to get some fresh air outside.  As she tried to take a deep breath of the outside air, it was a shallowed and labored breath and I teared as I realized she was getting close to leaving this earth.  I held her hand as we sat outside and I commented on her soft hands.  I said, "they are softer than mine grandma", she smiled, "Baby Magic!" I held her hands and commented that these hands have done quite a lot in her almost 95 years.  She was tender and reflective as we talked of her excitement in seeing her mom that died when she was just 16. She said she wasn't going to make it to 100 after all, but her comment, "Don't you think 2 weeks shy of 95 is a good amount of life?" Yes, grandma, especially your life. Even with her hearing being so limited, I found just the right voice tone that allowed us to carry on a lengthy conversation.   I smile at her wit and humor. She wonders what I am doing holding the phone up to take a selfie and patiently let me take a photo of our hands together. We talked of having her come and live with us instead of being in the nursing home, "that she was very verbal about not enjoying."  Emily quickly offered up her room and Ben commented, "that would be so cool, he could hug her every day and he would bring his friends over all the time to sit and listen to her and laugh at her jokes."  
Our family cherished our last visit with her just 4 days before she passed. She smiled as Ryan handed her a small plate and said that we had brought her a treat with peanut butter and chocolate! It was a moment suspended in time that she was lucid; she heard and remembered each of us. She even added her familiar wit as she notices Ben reach over and quietly try to take a piece of my gingerbread boy off my plate as I am not looking.  I turn to hear grandma blurt, with a mischievous smile on her face, and one finger gently waving in the air, "I'm going to tell on you!"

I love that she wanted to make a difference in people's lives, and she did.  She would whisper to me what a sweet girl I have always been and that just meant the world. Grandma would tell me each time she saw Jeff how blessed I was to have such a good man.  She would hold Ben's cheeks and nearly every single time comment on what a good hugger he has been all his little life.  Ryan had a choice time with grandma making gingerbread boys for a school project. She thought all my boys were just so handsome and loved hearing stories and seeing photos of all my kids’ accomplishments. She loved Emily's sweet personality and would whisper love to her as she sat on her lap and as she grew would tell her how sweet she was. Grandma would always comment on Courtney's charm and beauty and was so proud of her for serving a mission.   In recent years, I loved her stories to my children of anticipating all year long that one orange or a piece of candy or chocolate as a present on Christmas morn. Reminding us all to be a little more grateful and a lot more simple in our wants and needs in life.  Ahh the changes in the world she has seen in 95 years of life.   I will forever remember the moment as you visited grandma for the last time before your mission just 6 months ago and she looked up at you and said, " you know you are one of my heroes!"  and you responded, "you are one of mine too grandma."

I feel this way as well when I reflect on Grandma. One of my heroes in life, for what she has been able to do and be, often times with the toughest of circumstances.  I truly have always felt such a connection with grandma and her place in my life. My heart has been so tender as I think of not having her loving smile around.  The memories that she has created for each one of her family members are different for sure, but the overwhelming sense of love is a common thread and will forever remain in my heart and guide the way I live my life. 

"Surround yourself with people that reflect who you want to be and how you want to feel, energies are contagious."  

All my love, mom

Thank you so much for those reflections mom. I am very bad at expressing emotion in words and especially over email, but I laughed and cried as I read this email as I remembered memories of Grandma's hard work, love, and sense of humor and wit that she always had. She really is one of my greatest heroes and I feel so much peace knowing that she is now watching over me. I remember the last time I saw her and told her that I was going on a mission and I wasn't sure if she fully heard me and knew that I would be leaving. But when she hugged me goodbye she held onto me for just an extra few seconds and I knew that she knew that that was going to be the last time I saw her here in this life.
Express my love to everyone at home. I love you all and I love our family so much. And most of all I know that families can be together forever and we have a great family to be able to spend eternity with.
Love Elder Cox

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